Covid-19 isn’t going anywhere anytime soon, so we have to find a way to hold weddings while still attempting to socially distance. This is part 2 in my Covid wedding planning series. If you missed part 1, click to read about some entertainment alternatives instead of packing the dance floor.
Today I want to talk about how to plan for your ceremony and pre-ceremony while keeping social distancing and safety in mind. There are a few things you can do that really aren’t difficult and will go a long way toward improving the safety of your wedding for those attending.
The most over-arching safety tip is to hold your wedding outside as much as possible. Transmission of the virus is easier indoors, so the more things you hold outdoors, the safer you will be.
TL;DR here’s the video version
Pre-Ceremony
Refreshments
It’s common, especially during the summer, to have some non-alcoholic refreshments available for your guests as they arrive. Typically we include water, iced tea, and lemonade in self-serve dispensers on a table with disposable cups. Self-serve anything has got to go! You do not want any shared surfaces that are going to be touched by multiple people.
So instead of having drinks unattended on a table, add an attendant. Turn around all the dispensers so the nozzles are facing away from the guests and toward the attendant, who should be gloved and masked. Guests can request their drink, the attendant can dispense it and then hand it to the guest, and since the attendant is gloved, the transmission of germs is minimal.
Guest Book
The pens used to sign the guest book (whatever form it takes) are another problem area because they are shared by everyone. Even if you have multiple pens (which I always recommend), you don’t want to have one pen for each guest. Instead, provide plenty of sanitizing options for guests.
Individually wrapped sanitizing wipes can be placed in a container on the guest book table with a sign welcoming guests to sanitize the pen before they use it. Some guests will choose not to, but for the guests who are more cognizant of risk, having the sanitizer there will allay their concerns. You can also have pump hand sanitizer available (although I recommend decanting it into a nicer ceramic container, like a lotion pump, and labeled as sanitizer).
Ceremony
Seating
Typically at a wedding ceremony, the chairs are placed very close to one another in each row, and the rows are also fairly close together, especially for large guest counts where we’re trying to squeeze a lot of chairs into the space.
One option is to not have chairs at all and ask guests to stand. Most wedding ceremonies aren’t that long—30 minutes at most, usually closer to 20 minutes. It’s easy for guests to socially distance themselves when they are standing. Families can stand close together but leave plenty of space between them and the next group. If you have elderly guests who cannot stand that long, a few well-placed chairs near the front can accommodate them.
Another option is to place chairs in groupings with space between them. Instead of having rows close together, you could leave a gap of about four feet from the back of one row to the front on the next row. Chairs can be placed in groups of two and three with large gaps between one group and the next. It will definitely look a little odd, but it will be much safer.
Lastly, you could place the chairs in a normal configuration but ask people to leave empty seats between them. Rows should still be spaced further apart from each other, but each row would have the standard number of chairs in it (usually 6 - 10, depending on how many guests and rows you have). Signage and/or ushers could explain to guests that they should leave at least two empty seats between themselves and anyone they’re not in a household with.
The downside to this last approach is that you need more chairs, and therefore will have to spend more money. If you have 50 guests coming, normally you would need 50 chairs. Under scenario 2, you still only need 50 chairs. They’re just spaced out. But under scenario 3, you need 150 chairs, because you’re going to be leaving a lot of seats empty. So you have to decide which is more important to you: budget or aesthetics.
Officiant
Normally the ceremony officiant would stand quite close to the couple, and they may even share a microphone. Often if the mic is on a stand, the couple can use the same mic as the officiant, but when we use lapel mics, we usually mic the officiant and the groom. (For a same-sex wedding with two brides who are both wearing dresses, I don’t recommend lapel mics because there are no lapels to attach them to! It’s harder to clip and conceal a mic on a wedding dress, so in that case, a stand mic is your best bet.)
You don’t want the officiant to wear a mask because people need to be able to understand what they’re saying. But you also don’t want the officiant too close to the couple. So instead, the officiant should stand several feet back from the couple and should have a separate microphone from the one used by or clipped to one member of the couple.
Wedding Party
Consider limiting the number of people you ask to be in your wedding party. I would suggest a maximum of four people on each side, unless space is tight. In that case, limit yourself to one or two people per side. I’ve had weddings in small spaces with large wedding parties where the bridesmaids were practically breathing in each other’s hair because they had to stand so close together. This is the opposite of what we want!
You also should ask each member of your wedding party what their comfort level is when it comes to wedding party pairings. Many times, we pair up bridesmaids and groomsmen for the processional and/or recessional, and they may not know each other. Some may not be comfortable linking arms and being in close proximity to a virtual stranger. (And honestly, even if they know the person well, they still might not want to be in such close proximity to them.)
It’s perfectly acceptable for bridesmaids and groomsmen to walk in individually. There’s no wedding law that says they have to be paired up. So do what is best for you and your friends.
Programs
Wedding programs are on the decline. Many people opt not to have them at all, or to have a large sign positioned near the ceremony entrance with all the program information on it. If you want to have a ceremony program, the sign option is safer than individual paper copies. Again, it’s just one less thing that multiple people have to touch. Someone has to put out the programs, then your guests will touch them and inevitably leave them behind, so then someone has to collect them all. A sign eliminates all of that.
Tossing Items
I also recommend that you eliminate anything being tossed at the couple as they recess down the aisle at the end of the ceremony. Once again, you don’t really want to be flinging something that is potentially contaminated with virus particles. And definitely do not do a bubble exit! People tend to spit when blowing bubbles, and that’s a great way to infect people around you. So bubbles are out. Trust me, clapping is a sufficiently ebullient way to celebrate the pronouncement of marriage!
So that’s it for my ceremony tips. Next time, I’ll talk about cocktail hour and dinner! Let me know in the comments if there are any questions you want me to answer!