Regular readers of this blog will know that I’ve been purposely focused on continuing to provide general wedding advice that applies during normal times. I didn’t want to get overly caught up in Covid-19 wedding planning and was trying to stay optimistic that we would get back to weddings as we formerly knew them soon.

But it’s time to face facts: nothing is going back to normal anytime soon. As I write this in late May 2020, if you’re getting married any time in the next 18 months (through fall 2021), you are probably going to be dealing with Covid-19 problems, risks, and limitations. So let’s embrace reality and talk about HOW to plan a wedding in the middle of a global health crisis.

TL;DR here’s the video version

The Way Things Were

BC, Before Coronavirus, wedding reception entertainment revolved largely around dancing. There were the usual formal dances—the couple’s first dance, and then their dances with their parents. Then, after dinner, the party started, the DJ played high-energy tunes, and the dance floor was packed until the end of the night.

People were close to each other. People were sweaty. People were leaning in close and shouting in each other’s ears to be heard. People would put down their drink and pick it back up later, without real concern for who had breathed on it, or whether it was even their original drink.

Gross.

Our New Reality

The above scenario is a nightmare during an infectious disease outbreak. Anyone paying attention knows that Covid-19 spreads through droplets, and droplets are expelled when a person breathes, talks, sings, shouts, sneezes, or coughs. The more high-intensity the expulsion (coughs, sneezes, singing), the less time you need to be exposed before becoming infected. You can tolerate lower-intensity exposures (breathing, talking) for longer before your exposure becomes potentially dangerous and infectious.

In light of all this, packing the dance floor at your wedding is a great way to potentially infect all of your guests. It only takes one asymptomatic infected guest to turn your wedding into ground zero for the next outbreak hot spot.

So let’s not do that. Let’s do something else instead.

Alternative Entertainment Options for Your Wedding Reception

Low-Key Music

Your DJ can still be deeply involved in your reception entertainment, even if he/she isn’t playing the typical high-energy dance music. They usually play low-key music during dinner anyway, so that can continue past dinner. Rather than a wedding reception like we’ve all been too, your wedding would be more like a dinner party. But that’s okay! At least you’re still celebrating with your friends and family.

Games

Some DJs and MCs have a repertoire of games that they incorporate into their weddings, usually during dinner. If that’s something that interests you, talk to your DJ about doing the games after dinner, in lieu of dancing. Many of the games I’ve seen in the past have involved some amount of shared props, which is a problem. You don’t want your guests to have to touch things that other guests have touched, unless they’re part of the same household. So you and your DJ might have to re-think some of their usual games, but it can be done.

Live Musicians

Instead of hiring a DJ, maybe you want to hire live musicians to play instead. It’s more entertaining for people to watch musicians play than it is to watch a DJ push buttons, lol. You could hire a string quartet for your ceremony and cocktail hour, and then a jazz trio or a brass section for dinner and post-dinner.

You can easily dance your first dance and parent dances to live music. Just make sure your dance floor is so small that guests aren’t encouraged to come out onto it later in the evening.

Non-Musical Entertainment

Some of these ideas can veer too far into kid’s birthday party if not done well, but they’re still entertaining! Consider hiring a mentalist or magician—again, no direct touching between guests should be incorporated. Mentalists mostly stick to asking questions and then divining information about the audience. And there are plenty of magicians (or Illusionists for my Arrested Development fans out there) who can perform card tricks and similar entertainments.

Artists are another non-musical option. You can hire a portraitist to sketch quick portraits of couples or small friend groups. Or even a caricaturist, if that’s to your liking.

Something really cool that I’ve seen at corporate parties but have never had a wedding client do is to hire an artist to live paint a scene from the wedding throughout the night. This would work best if you wanted them to paint a scene from the ceremony, because it happens early on in the event. The artist does his/her initial work live during the moment, and then fills in details throughout the rest of the evening. Your guests can check in on its progress at various times, and then at the end of the night, you could do a big reveal of the final painting. Bonus: you now have an amazing piece of custom art for your home!

And my last suggestion is something you definitely can only do if you’re having an outdoor wedding: hire a fire dancer! You may have seen this one coming, based on the photo at the top. I saw this performer at a venue opening party earlier this year, and she’s amazing! So fun to watch!

You Might Even Save Money

It is unfortunate that you might not have the exact wedding that you envisioned, but you’re making the best of a bad situation. One silver lining is that you may end up saving money with your amended wedding agenda. Without party dancing, your reception does not need to go until 10 or 11 pm. It can reasonably end at 8 or 9 pm. That’s a lot less drinking by your guests, saving you a boatload of money!

You may also be able to get away with shorter packages from your other vendors. Instead of paying to add one or two hours to your DJ’s standard 5-hour package, that standard package is now definitely enough. Same goes for photography, and possibly your wedding coordinator.

It’s going to be a long time before we get back to weddings as they were before, but with some ingenuity, we can adapt and find new ways to celebrate.

Next time, I’ll have some tips for you on how to have a socially distanced, yet still in person, wedding.